Favoriting Seven Second Delay with Andy and Ken: Playlist from June 7, 2017 Favoriting

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The program formerly known as Dinner at Andy's, The Fuzzy Glove Hour, Whores, and The Happiness Hut. Ken and Andy, also known as The Enema Boys, further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards on a weekly basis. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

Wednesday 6 - 7pm (EDT) | On WFMU | 91.1, 90.1, 91.9 FM & wfmu.org
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Favoriting June 7, 2017: Ken vs Andy: The Battle of the Zingers

Listen to this show: Pop-up listen Pop-up player!

Andy and Ken play against each other to guess the punchlines to jokes told by callers. To make things interesting, a $10 wager is placed. Andy joins the show offsite from his office, where he writes his new show for Netflix.

Callers provide many great jokes, most of which stump Ken and Andy. Beth calls in, and together she and Andy tell a convoluted joke about an old Jewish man and brisket. Other notable entries are:

-What do you call a fake noodle? (Ken comes up with "Riga-phoney" for this one, which is better than the real punchline of "impasta". Ken's alternate punchline impresses Andy greatly.)

-What do you all a chicken coop with four doors? A chicken sedan.

-What's brown and sticky? A stick.(Andy LOVES this joke)

-Why can't witches have babies? Because they have hollow weenies.

-What's an owl's favorite rock band? The Who. (Ken guessed this one)

-What does the germophobe call mints at a restaurant? Excremints.

Also, a new slogan for WFMU is derived... "Difficult Listening." (Apologies to Laurie Anderson)

Ken and Andy discuss the possibility of putting some form of this on a billboard on Route 280.

Recap by Andrew M.

Artist Approx. start time
Ken & Andy  0:00:00 (Pop-up)


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Listener comments!

Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:03pm
Sebastian:

a rabbi, a nun and an Irishman listen to the radio...good evening!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:05pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

The co-host with stand-up comedy experience should have the edge here. In theory.
  6:05pm
JakeGould:

WFMU-FM: Uneasy Listening
Avatar 6:06pm
(Murakami Whywolf))):

Laurie Anderson has lawyers.
  6:06pm
JakeGould:

I thought “Zingers” were snack cakes and they would have some eating competition. :/
Avatar 6:09pm
Nick the Bard:

zingers are snack cakes, remember back when they had that, 60 people in 60 minutes talent show at the UBC remotes? I was actually a back up person for that, and my bit would've been, I get up on stage, make it like I was going to read a crappy poem, and then pelt Andy with Zinger cakes for a minute. Except everyone showed up, so I never got to go on stage :(
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:09pm
PMD:

Ken so little faith in yourself.
  6:09pm
Dean:

Divine the Punch Line is a way better name for this competition than Battle of the Zingers.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:11pm
joe mulligan:

ken 1 andy 0
  6:11pm
JakeGould:

I wonder if it’s okay to eat Zingers during Ramadan as a dessert?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:11pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

I woulda gone with "Lyin' ziti"
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:12pm
common:

Agreed, dean
Avatar 6:12pm
(Murakami Whywolf))):

Ken and Andy should write their answers independently of each other, then reveal them.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:13pm
howard in nyc:

A chicken sedan
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:15pm
Power Papi:

These are riddles, not jokes.
Avatar 6:15pm
(Murakami Whywolf))):

JakeGould:
It's o.k. if they're halal and it's night-time.
  6:16pm
JakeGould:

“What do you call a fake pasta?”
“Orzo…” *ducks*
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:17pm
howard in nyc:

Mace
  6:17pm
ike:

Yes! Ken deserves at least 0.5 points, dammit!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:17pm
howard in nyc:

(or pepper spray)
  6:19pm
michelle mello:

Hi friends. Tuning in l8 but can't wait to hear some zingers
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:19pm
howard in nyc:

Oh wait, I suppose I should not post my guesses at the punch, because if Ken is watching the chat board he will have an unfair advantage. So I'll stop.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:20pm
Sebastian:

I picture howard hunched over the big book of the world's 1.000.000 best jokes (and riddles)
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:20pm
dale:

howard in nyc - 'because of the pepper spray' is HI-larious. you win that point.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:22pm
howard in nyc:

just a couple of lucky guesses. Missed the pasta joke.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:23pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

That sounds pretty neat. Where do I go to buy these Netflix videotapes to play on my VHS at home?
  6:23pm
Dean:

Oh, for crying out loud. The answer is "a brown stick." Jesus. Is it me? Am I humor impaired?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:23pm
Sebastian:

I'm sure that's the case, but the picture is great, it's a huuuge book
  6:24pm
Dean:

Here's a joke sans punch line: I told my mother I was going to run away.
  6:24pm
Dean:

She replied, "On your mark..."
  6:25pm
Dean:

(Dangerfield)
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:25pm
Hoboken Jack:

Great to hear you on-air, Fredericks!
Avatar 6:25pm
(Murakami Whywolf))):

'I wasn' t paying attention to them. '
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:26pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

This is fantastic
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:26pm
dale:

what starts with f and ends with uck? FANTASTIC LUCK!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:26pm
Sebastian:

Ken is just piling up that half-a-points
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:27pm
Sebastian:

I really hope someone calls in with a knock-knock-joke
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:28pm
dale:

my step grandma was vera and my real grandma was hattie belle. real 19th century names.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:29pm
dale:

because warlocks are impotent.
  6:30pm
JakeGould:

Q: What’s the difference between Andy Breckman and a fidget spinner?
A: For $5 a fidget spinner can provide some entertainment value.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:31pm
PMD:

Oh that reminds me, I need to call up and just say penis over and over
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:31pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

I heard this one in like the third grade. Hollow weenies!
  6:32pm
Dean:

God damn puns.
  Swag For Life Member 6:32pm
Walt:

Hollow weenies? Should be for warlocks, not witches.
  6:33pm
JakeGould:

Brooklyn! Woo!
Avatar 6:33pm
Fredericks:

Larry was making a UFO joke
Avatar 6:34pm
Fredericks:

I'll try and do it more, Hobo!
  6:35pm
JakeGould:

Mozzafellony!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:35pm
dale:

ken is pretty good with a punchline.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:36pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

"That's nacho cheese!"
  6:36pm
JakeGould:

Q: What do you say when someone steals your chip?
A: Nacho chip!
  6:37pm
Dean:

Yes!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:37pm
howard in nyc:

here's one.

What does a Russian bride get from her husband on her wedding day that is long and hard?
  6:38pm
JakeGould:

An iron curtain!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:38pm
Greg from ZONE 5:

"Have you lost weight?"
Avatar 6:39pm
(Murakami Whywolf))):

'Your waist is so slim!'
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:39pm
dale:

"hey - get off of her!' (thinking it's two zeros humping)
  6:39pm
Dean:

Wait. The wedding day is long and hard?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:40pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

A broom or a mop ... one of those.
  6:40pm
JakeGould:

Long and hard Russian wedding day gift: AN IRON CURTAIN!!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:41pm
common:

Hee, "I just think all the bands are wearing belts."
  6:43pm
JakeGould:

Q: Why was Bill bored?
  6:43pm
Dean:

Bill Posters is innocent!
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:44pm
PMD:

Andy, you are making enough money now to create that billboard
Avatar 6:45pm
Will from Seattle:

sechs und vier
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:46pm
Sebastian:

Trouble!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:46pm
common:

Trouble!
Avatar 6:47pm
Nick the Bard:

Billboard advertising cost varies greatly depending on location, size, population, campaign duration and demand. For example, 4 weeks of billboard advertising in Baraboo, WI will only cost $250, while a 4-week duration in New York City goes for over $14,000.
Avatar 🚂 Swag For Life Member 6:48pm
PMD:

Well he can DEFINITELY afford one in Baraboo, WI
  6:49pm
JakeGould:

What about just a roaming billboard truck?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:49pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

For a radio stunt, you should have Clay do a remote broadcast from the billboard for a month.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:49pm
dale:

i see you're nuts.
Avatar 6:49pm
Fredericks:

I can clearly see your nuts
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:49pm
howard in nyc:

Ok, to recap:
What does a Russian bride get from her husband on her wedding day that is long and hard?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Her new last name.
Avatar 6:50pm
Nick the Bard:

from what I saw, billboard trucks start at $3,000, but i'm not sure what the duration is
  6:50pm
JakeGould:

Hire a guy named William Board to hand out handbills about WFMU?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:50pm
dale:

'cuz evan doesn't know about his own testes.
Avatar 6:51pm
Nick the Bard:

Alternatively you can install and manage the billboard yourself. Factoring in all material and construction costs, a 14’ x 48’ billboard can range from around $15,000 – $20,000 for a wooden structure and $40,000 to $100,000+ for a steel structure. The exact cost depends on the height of the sign (distance from the ground) and whether it’s double or single-sided. (Quotes are from North Carolina’s 2015 Billboard Structures Valuation Guide)
  6:52pm
JakeGould:

@HerbinNYC: That should read “What does a Russian groom give is bride that is long and hard?” A Russian bride can conceivably marry anyone from any place.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:52pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

How much does it cost to wrap a vehicle? Buy an old panel van, wrap it with WFMU slogans and web address and drive it around town.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:53pm
dale:

it's for his wake.
Avatar 6:53pm
Jeff:

I'm saving it for the funeral!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:53pm
howard in nyc:

@JakeGould: that is better. I'm not a professional.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:54pm
Doug Schulkind:

The dying father is a mohel. So he needed his bris kit.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:56pm
Ken From Hyde Park:

This joke has gone all meshugga.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:59pm
Sebastian:

Great show, thanks guys!
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