Options Seven Second Delay with Ken and Andy: Playlist from November 28, 2018 Options

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Ken and Andy further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards as the program enters its death throes. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options November 28, 2018: Single Phone Line Theater: Call 201-209-0750

Listen to this show: MP3 - 128K | | Add or read comments

Hey Kids! Tonight, we present a very special episode of Seven Second Delay: The first-ever Single Phone Line Theater production of Charles Dicken's holiday classic, A Christmas Carol. Here is how it will work:

Ken and Andy will begin the show by insulting one another briefly, and then casting the six parts for the play. Download the full script here.

Here is the problem: We only have one phone line tonight. So our cast will have to take turns reading their parts.

It's as if we are performing a play on the radio and there is only one phone line to call.

IF YOU ARE IN THE CAST: whenever it is your line, call this number: 201-209-0750 (that really is a new number!). Once Nick the Bard vets you, we will put you on the air, and you will deliver the next line.

Want to join us? Download the script here, and here is a pic of the first page of this heartwarming piece of theater:

Artist
Ken & Andy 

Listener comments!

Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:01pm dale:

can't you give every other actor andy's cell phone number to move things along?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:04pm Linda Lee:

gee .. vetting by Nick for every line? this will be a slow one.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:04pm Asheville Jon:

hey LL, nice seeing you here.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:05pm Asheville Jon:

i bet the play doesn't get past the third page of script
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:05pm Linda Lee:

are we ready for this? :-D
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:07pm Linda Lee:

i'd say page 3 is definitely the limit.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:08pm queems:

this is pretty ambitious
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:10pm Asheville Jon:

never gonna get to the Flame's lines
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:11pm Ken From Hyde Park:

This is similar to the Doctor Gameshow episode doing Romeo and Juliet.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:11pm Linda Lee:

casting alone will take a quarter hour!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:12pm queems:

i feel like i have had just enough wine to take part in this
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:12pm Linda Lee:

actually, i'll give casting til 630.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:12pm Linda Lee:

go for it queems!
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:13pm boo boo:

Are the two 9368#s now defunct?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:15pm Jeff Moore:

David Krumholtz!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:15pm queems:

@linda lee i think my attention span is too short :(
  Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:15pm Listener Robert:

My friend Allen J. Rickman was in "Boardwalk Empire" too.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:15pm Linda Lee:

this will definitely take concentration.
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:15pm yes:

David krumholtz
  Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:15pm Listener Robert:

L! I meant Allen L. Rickman, not J!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:15pm dale:

kyle is in cincinnati on business - sorry.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:16pm queems:

usually when too many people talk at once, i just tune right out
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:16pm (Murakami Whywolf))):

The players better hang up like the wind when their lines end.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:16pm Jeff Moore:

We just saw him pop up in that new Coen Brothers movie (The Ballad of Buster Scruggs).
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:16pm JakeGould:

Shea Whigham? Eli Thompson?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:16pm Linda Lee:

i gave buscemi a cigarette in a bar once. it went through an intermediary.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:17pm (Murakami Whywolf))):

The cast party is going to be _wild_.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:17pm Linda Lee:

i'm afraid i don't see a successful night here, kids.
  Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:17pm Listener Robert:

Allen L. Rickman was in the new Coen Bros. movie?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:18pm queems:

get ready to collect on your insurance policies folks
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:18pm (((Murakami Whywolf):

Linda Lee:
What, Buscemi actually smoked it _through_ someone else's body, like a living hookah? How does that even _work_? (...and why didn't Bill Burroughs ever use that image?)
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:18pm JakeGould:

Stephen Root? WHAT ELSE COULD IT BE GENIUSES!!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:19pm dale:

i met darren mcgavin 'the night stalker' once - but he'd dead now. maybe he can play marley's ghost?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:20pm (Murakami Whywolf))):

Linda Lee:
Of course it will be a train-wreck---the point of the show always seems to be seeing what kind of train-wreck develops.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:20pm Nick the Bard:

201-209-0750


CALL

THAT

NUMBER
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:21pm Linda Lee:

both the cigarette request and the transaction were achieved through a third party. i do believe it was smoked in the usual way by the person who made the original request from inside an opaque sheild of cronies.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:22pm (((Murakami Whywolf):

'Who wrote this---Henry Darger!?'---Sgt Hatred.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:22pm dale:

is the nephew tiny tim? THAT'S the plum part!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:22pm queems:

nephew i think is tiny tim's dad
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:22pm queems:

no just kidding, i'm wrong
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:23pm queems:

that's bob whatever his name is
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:23pm (Murakami Whywolf))):

The nephew's is called 'Fred'.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:24pm Linda Lee:

a living hookah might've been too obvious for Bill..
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:24pm Asheville Jon:

at this rate, the play will never start
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:25pm dale:

tiny tim is sad sack bob cratchitts gimp kid. the nephew is wealthy and happy and keeps trying to get scrooge to come hang out for christmas. they aren't the same part.
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:25pm boo boo:

This is the slowest car crash.
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:25pm Andy (DC):

OK, so I call in and hang up line by line?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:26pm (((Murakami Whywolf):

Tony Shalhoub called-in in 2002 and look where _that_ went.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:26pm queems:

THANK YOU DALE this is false advertising
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:26pm dale:

boo boo - HA!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:27pm queems:

this is giving me extraordinary anxiety
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:27pm Ken From Hyde Park:

<applause>
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:27pm Linda Lee:

oh boy.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:28pm dale:

201 209 9368?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:28pm Linda Lee:

wrong number, dale!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:29pm queems:

0750
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:29pm Linda Lee:

hey Jude, please call the show.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:29pm Nick the Bard:

201-209-0750

ONLY

THIS

NUMBER

WORKS
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:29pm Juliette from Harding:

This is just tooo much fun! Where is Jude?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:30pm queems:

LOLOL i can't handle this
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:30pm Patty D:

Just tuning in. I feel like i missed a lot.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:30pm Asheville Jon:

why, oh why didn't i buys bad show insurance when i had the chance. this is a sure bet for a pay out
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:30pm Linda Lee:

you were made to be our narrator.
remember, the number is a new one.
then you can start to make it better.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:30pm dale:

i was just throwing lighter fluid on the smoldering compost heap.
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:31pm Pete:

Yeah, Jude! Don't make it bad! (too late!!!)
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:31pm queems:

thank you, mystery narrator
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:31pm boo boo:

How is this rougher than old timey days with manual switchboard operators? This is hilarious!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:32pm Fredericks:

How long is the delay?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:32pm Jude in JC:

That was me Jude...
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:32pm Jude in JC:

Called a few times...
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:33pm queems:

jude you're up again
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:33pm Linda Lee:

is it too late to buy bad show insurance?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:33pm dale:

the tony awards are safe another year.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:33pm Fredericks:

In 1998, they could eavesdrop and now they cannot?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:33pm Jude in JC:

yeah, phones are working right... lol
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:33pm queems:

i admire your perseverance
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:33pm Juliette from Harding:

Crying I am laughing so hard; i feel we all need to make new donations towards a new phone
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:34pm dale:

he was overselling that scrooge, if you were to ask vincent canby
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:34pm Linda Lee:

Ken might've planned this one just a wee bit better.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:34pm Jude in JC:

yes, let's donate! support WFMU!! <3
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:34pm queems:

maybe this is the wine talking, but aside from the extreme anxiety, i am enjoying this show quite a bit
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:34pm Fredericks:

Come on Jude, don't blow it again>
  Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:34pm Listener Robert:

Wait, I like where this is going! How often is Scrooge's UNCLE included in this, huh?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:35pm dale:

i would like a glass of talking wine.
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:35pm Pete:

Hey Jude, don't let me down.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:35pm queems:

@dale get yourself a whole can and thank me later
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:36pm queems:

what is this goddamn cookie monster bullshit
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:36pm dale:

canned wine -why has that NOT ever been a thing?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:37pm dale:

fozzy bear as scrooge.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:38pm Linda Lee:

boxes are cheaper.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:38pm queems:

@linda lee good call
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:38pm Linda Lee:

in the golden age of radio the actors were in the studio!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:38pm Nick the Bard:

expensive as shit canned wine recommendations - imbibemagazine.com...
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:39pm Jude in JC:

I can't stop laughing...
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:39pm Fredericks:

One Mic just like in Bluegrass!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:39pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Coming next year Black Friday: K-cup wine
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:39pm dale:

yeah, but it's a bag in a box. go with just the box and you have a mess. a can is portable, recyclable, chillable....
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:39pm queems:

@nick i'm drinking underwood, which is on that list
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:40pm PigeonsAndRust:

Someone should conference in all the players on their cell phone and then call in to the station!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:41pm Linda Lee:

still bet the box is cheaper, even plus bag.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:42pm Nick the Bard:

well, there is a beer k-cup system

theworstthingsforsale.com...
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:43pm Nick the Bard:

and there's SORT OF a wine one

www.self.com...
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:43pm dale:

there goes my million dollar idea nick the bard. some douchebag is getting rich off of it!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:44pm queems:

HAHAHHAAH
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:44pm dale:

where's my car, dude?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:44pm JakeGould:

Canned wine is fine. Boxed wine is fine too.
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:44pm boo boo:

Next time Hangouts (up to 9 video callers) so we can all watch the trainwreck.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:44pm queems:

oh god i just screamed irl
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:45pm Nick the Bard:

Orson Wells best film he ever made - Transformers The Movie
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:45pm queems:

there are no orson welles's here
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:46pm dale:

agnes moorehead called in on a candlestick phone through her operator.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:46pm Linda Lee:

@queems ~ may your neighbors be oblivious.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:46pm dale:

they'll love me when i'm dead used some music from suicide which surprised me.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:47pm JakeGould:

Raul Julia as M. Bison in Street Fighter. Just saying!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:47pm queems:

whoa scrooge needs a xanax
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:48pm Linda Lee:

@dale ~ i'm not sure i get the connection. was he a Suicide fan?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:48pm Asheville Jon:

wow, we might actually GET to page three!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:49pm Ken From Hyde Park:

There was a Google Hangouts 7SD episode in 2015.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:49pm Asheville Jon:

andy can't be in the play, wtf? GO TO HELL ANDY
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:49pm dale:

the most bizarre part of that doc was showing that orson hired rich little to play his protege (the peter bogdonovich character) in the film. that and he lived with peter and cybill shepard and got furious when there were no fudgesickles.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:49pm PigeonsAndRust:

At this rate we can fill up every 7SD from now to Christmas
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:49pm queems:

this is just a free for all now
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:49pm dale:

linda - just whoever produced the doc used that as incidental music.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:50pm Linda Lee:

i sort of figured so.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:50pm Kat in Chicago:

This is more entertaining than I expected it to be!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:51pm queems:

@kat AGREED
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:51pm dale:

DIE! DIE YOU POOR PEOPLE DIE!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:51pm dale:

the lux theater, the new david cinema....
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:53pm Linda Lee:

a fine description of tonight's production, right there.. poo poo!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:53pm JakeGould:

Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill the poor!
Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill the poor!
Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill the poor!
Tonight!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:54pm Linda Lee:

i could listen to Jude read anything, frankly.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:54pm Kat in Chicago:

nice sound FX
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:55pm queems:

jude's killing it
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:55pm chris:

enjoying the foley work as well.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:55pm Asheville Jon:

oh, time's up, show's over, play the outtro music
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:56pm Linda Lee:

should've just let Jude read the story!
  Wed. 11/28/18 6:57pm spodiodi:

This is magic in the making
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:57pm queems:

someone call in and hug sm ken
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:57pm dale:

'want me to pay someone to hug you?'
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:57pm Asheville Jon:

this show is just swell with this playing in the background
www.youtube.com...
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:58pm Linda Lee:

wrong line, Marley!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:58pm Linda Lee:

wrong Marley too!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:58pm JakeGould:

@AshevilleJon: That music is horrible.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:59pm Asheville Jon:

like i said, it goes with the show!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:59pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Who's calling in with the station ID?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:59pm Jude in JC:

<3
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 6:59pm JakeGould:

@AshevilleJon: Ohhhh!!!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 7:00pm queems:

great job, jude
  Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 7:00pm Listener Robert:

Just jump to the last line already!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 7:00pm Linda Lee:

beautiful job, Jude.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 7:00pm Jude in JC:

so much fun!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 7:01pm Ken From Hyde Park:

<applause>
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 11/28/18 7:02pm Kat in Chicago:

god bless us every one
Avatar Swag For Life Member Thu. 11/29/18 7:56pm PMD:

I'm so sad I wasn't able to listen live. For some odd reason.
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