Options Aerial View: Playlist from September 1, 2015 Options

Aerial View was WFMU’s first regularly-scheduled phone-in talk show. Hosted by Chris T. and on the air since 1989, the show features topical conversation, interviews and many trips down the rabbit hole. Until further notice, Aerial View is only available as a podcast, available every Tuesday morning. Subscribe to the newsletter “See You Next Tuesday!” and find tons of archives at aerialview.me. (Visit homepage.)

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Options September 1, 2015: This Wasted Land
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Tonight: This Wasted Land
As pointed out last week, Aerial View will soon be available in podcast form only. As much as I'd like to stay on the air, the station rules preclude broadcasting from home (or doing a pre-recorded show) for someone who isn't geographically remote. 

There are two live shows left (tonight and next Tuesday) until at least June of 2016. If you're already listening to Aerial View as a podcast, nothing will change. If you want to make sure you get the show automagically, check the How To Hear Aerial View section, below.

I'd like to keep these next two shows freeform, so call 201-209-WFMU and talk about anything you'd like. To get things started I'll be asking if you think America has squandered its promise and become a Wasted Land. I'm leaning towards "Yes"...
Last Week: Feet (Don't) Fail Me Now!
Last week's show was a tough one to get through, so thanks for all the great calls and the support. Not everyone loves what I do on the air but there's nothing I can do about that. I know there are some  out there who will rejoice when they hear that Aerial View is off the air, even if it is available as a podcast. Someone once told me "Mean people say mean things." and at first I thought it was a rather simplistic statement. Then I delved into it and realized the subtext: There's no point in agonizing over the people who don't like you or what you do. 

Now, here are some people who DO like what I do:
  • Sad news for us Aerial Viewers. Good luck with your surgeries and recovery, Chris T! You will be missed.
  • I'll be listening to your podcast!
  • Damn, we'll miss you, Chris T! But most importantly, get your feet back in working order and we'll see you in '16!
  • Would you rather have a fully functional, healthy and normal foot, or would you want it removed for some kind of gizmo-ridden bionic prosthetic?
  • I have to run out in a minute. I'll be listening to the podcast tomorrow as usual, but I just wanted to say best of luck with all the surgery and rehab stuff. Looking forward to the podcast and your comeback though!
  • I dropped a trailer hitch on one big toe, and an air compressor on the other big toe. the nails broke and have taken like two years to grow out. one still looks like a weird gargoyle toe. like chris said, i now wear steel toed boots. just got a new pair cuz a tomcat peed on my old ones.
  • Too bad they won't bend the station rules for you Chris.
  • Hmmm...could be a good opportunity for you to move to CA, as you've thought about doing before. :)
  • I love it when people stumble on the station and call. Sometimes people call DJs playing music and ask them what the hell is going on haha.
  • Chris T , you suck ( not really but you said the niceness was getting to you so I wanted to neutralize that).
  • Hey Chris. I was feeling pretty lousy today and now I feel even worse. You'll be missed. Good luck with the surgery. God speed.
  • Godspeed Chris T, take care of your health and come back soon! I guess I'll have to learn about this podcast thing that the kids are doing now...
  • By the way, I've been listening to your show, on terrestrial radio, for many years...
  • I discovered your show right after you returned to the air (5 yrs ago or so). It was by accident because I was listening to a Downtown Soulville podcast while mowing the lawn and the file continued into the first few minutes of your show and between the cool audio collage intro and the fact that you were talking about Jonesy, I knew I had to see what was up. Sorry for the run on sentence. I dig what you do is all I'm sayin'.
  • Chris T is the best WFMU talker. Get well.
Nice Or Not

Listen to this show: | Add or read comments

"See you every day..." (6x)
You’re my baby, got my eyes on you."

"You have a nice cock!"
she said,
seeing it for the first time.
I’d never thought of my cock
as nice.
I knew it worked
and was grateful
but how it stacked up -
whether it was
nice or not -
never occured to me.
We met in earnest
my cock and I
when I was twelve.
Searching though my parent’s closet
because I needed money
and knew my mother always kept some
in one of her purses 
on what used to be
my father’s side of the bed.
He was moving out,
leaving the king-size
to her;
she migrated west
across the bed
to my father’s side.
We all came across
to my father’s side
whether we wanted
to or not.
Mario -
genius with his hands -
could repair anything - 
you gave him,
being a true artist
of all things mechanical.
And the back of 
those same hands -
able to
fabricate extinct parts 
from raw steel and patience -
would be across your face
in a flash
to keep you quiet,
correct your mistakes
remind you who was boss -
give you a taste of "what for"
(whatever the fuck THAT was).
They'd been married 
seventeen years,
had five children
in five years
and it was over
and I was twelve
searching for coins 
or maybe a dollar bill
in my mother’s blue wallet,
the picture of me
with my brothers and sisters
from Easter ‘68
accusing me
as I robbed mom.
But I didn’ think of it as stealing...
this was money 
she meant to give me
but never got around to.
Money to supplement
my allowance -
five dollars a week -
washing the dishes
taking out the garbage
mowing the lawn
weeding the garden
shoveling snow
going to the store
to Queeny’s
(South Shore Self-Serve to you,
Queeny’s to me, 
Queeny being the large man
behind the counter asking
“Are you SURE this is for your mother?)
for cigarettes
for fruit
for ham
for milk
(ALWAYS for milk
which I didn’t drink
except with chocolate in
because it was grass-juice
fermented in
the stomach of a cow -
deeply unappealling to me
except with chocolate in)
for batteries
cough syrup
cold capsules
for Skippy's
for Hawaiian Punch
For Domino's
Vienna Fingers
for Butterfinger
Ring Dings
Funny Bones
for yourself -
you always got something
for yourself:
a reward for trudging one block down
one block over
stepping though the one door
no cart for me
I lug everything
to the counter
say to Queeny
“Put it on the tab."
but lately the tab
had run dry
and I was looking for money
staring at myself
Easter ‘68
my brothers and sisters
and I 
arranged in order of height
as usual
did they also come in here?
did they all have their hands
creeping through the drawer
in the dark
furtively checking
over their left shoulder
toward the door
ears attuned
for the slightest sound
of approach
ready to bolt
into the bathroom
at the rear of the bedroom
with the ready excuse
“Somebody was in already in there."
when you were asked:
“What are you doing in here?
There’s another bathroom.
Why are you in mine?
it was easy enough to lie
I was already stealing
and now I had progressed
from empty drawer
to the closet
not sure why
I thought there’d be money
in the bottom of the closet
or what the hell I thought I’d find
but it was Playboy
tumbled blonde naked women
brunettes with huge tits
and candy
beautiful women
with no clothes on
fuck me
Something better than money
I shoved it up under my shirt
the cover cool on my skin
and marveled at the wonders inside
here they finally were
all my sister’s friends
the girls in my school
the ones my eyes
not sure why
it should appeal to me
as it did,
their flesh
and not sure
what it would look like
not sure what naked was
unless it was me
and that doesn’t count
I don’t look at myself naked
even if I can
but here they were
sprawled on a velvet landscape
so those are tits?
and that’s an ass?
and - oh my
Pussy Galore
says to James
“Am I too much for you?
James knows
there’s no such thing
too much pussy
I’m lying on top 
of the Impala
station wagon
at the Johnny All-Weather Drive-In
and Goldfinger 
is laying out his plan
to knock over Fort Knox
Silly fat man
fucking Kraut...
up against Bond
and his tricked-out
Aston Martin
machine guns
tire shredders
bullet screen
oil slick
smoke screen
revolving plate
battering rams
ejection seat
and soon Pussy
is tumbling with James
in the hay
and I tingle
at the sight of her
and no one tells me why
I sneak glances at
Rosemary Longo
and imagine her
all day and night
snapping off her stockings
lifting her plaid skirt
pulling down white panties
smiling at me
over curled lip
blonde hair 
falling down
I can feel it
on my cock
her blonde hair
and I smuggle her downstairs
with the other dopplegangers
all naked
ink on paper
into the basement
the room with the oil furnace
the mat on the floor
pants down
centerfold down
right hand
from somewhere:
bu-da bu-da da
da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da
bu-da-bu-da da
da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da
bu-da bu-da da
da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da
bu-da bu-da da
da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da da-da
bu-da bu-da
“You need coolin’
baby I ain’t foolin
I’m gonna send ya
back to schoolin’.
Way down inside -
women you need love -
gonna give you my love
gonna give you my love."
Miss July
Miss July
is that your pussy
that I spy?
“James -
fuck me!"
when he comes, little children
when he comes
Death gonna straigten out
all you members 
when he comes."

Straightened out.
flat on back
never thinking about my cock
whether it was nice or not
knowing it liked naked women
and being rubbed
and was now center
of my every waking thought
but it turns out
it’s nice cock, too.
On your own
it’d be a king
but it's too attached
to me -
coward - 
go off on your own
see how far you’ll get
nice or not.
New Aerial View Facebook Group
I finally figured out how to embed AudioBoom versions of the show on the See You Next Tuesday! Facebook Group page! Look for more content there as the podcast-only show becomes a reality
Upcoming Events
WFMU Literary Guild Meet Up
The next WFMU Literary Guild Meet Up happens Sat., Sep. 18 at the KGB Bar at 85 East 4th St., NYC.

On the bill:  Please join the new WFMU Literary Guild Facebook Group and follow the Twitter account. All hail the written word!
Pencil Me In
Come and join us for Pencil Me In, the Monmouth Museum Emerging Artist exhibit featuring eighteen pieces by wife Janet Tsakis. Opening night is Friday, September 18, 6 - 8 pm.

Wed., Oct. 7, 7 - 8 pm, Janet gives an Artist Talk. The show runs until October 18.

The piece above will be in the show.
Obligatory Throwback Pic
Easter '68
L - R: Joan (RIP), Joanie (RIP), Me, Diana, Marc, Mario Jr. (RIP), Mario (RIP)
How To Hear Aerial View
OVER THE AIR: Every Tuesday night, 6 PM Eastern time on WFMU in the metro NY/NJ area at 91.1 FM and on WMFU at 90.1 in the lower Catskills, Hudson Valley, western New Jersey and Eastern Pennsylvania.

ON THE WEB: Streaming audio in several formats is available at wfmu.org.
ON DEMAND ARCHIVES: The Aerial View Archive page features archives going back to nearly the beginning of the show in RealAudio and MP3 format.
PODCAST: Aerial View is available on iTunes as a podcast.
WFMU MOBILE: Listen live via the mobile app or browse the archives. Get the iOS app here and the Android version here. Amazon Kindle users can use the TuneIn Radio app. Info for other platforms, including Blackberry, etc. can be found here.

AUDIOBOOM: Hear Aerial View and easily share it on social media here. Mobile apps are here.
 "I'll see you TONIGHT, 6 PM Eastern time, on WFMU!"
Aerial View
Aerial View
Artist Track Year Format Approx. start time
Led Chris T. Zeppelin  Aerial Kashmir View   Options 2015  WAV  0:00:00 ()

Listener comments!

  Tue. 9/1/15 6:02pm -andrew-:

Evening Chris!
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:04pm Chris T.:

Good evening, all! This is our 2nd-to-last live show together! Let's make it a good one.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Tue. 9/1/15 6:06pm Ken From Hyde Park:

The foot in the swirling GIF reminds me of the one at the end of the opening of Monty Python's Flying Circus.
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:06pm dale:

i had that corgi james bond aston martin.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Tue. 9/1/15 6:10pm Marcel M:

Yo Chris! Friends! Hello.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Tue. 9/1/15 6:11pm Folsom:

"Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to make the world's first bionic man. Chris T. will be that man. Better than he was before. Better...stronger...faster."
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:14pm -andrew-:

I miss having a job where I could just listen to music/podcasts/WFMU archives for 85% of my shift. The schedule sucked, but that was a nice trade off.
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:15pm dale:

maybe it was montovani
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:17pm dale:

that sounds like sportsy talk
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:18pm dale:

what he said
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:18pm Listener 102365:

More Sugar!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Tue. 9/1/15 6:24pm Ike:

Some classical stations play a lot of terrible melodramatic 20th-century movie music, so that's probably what Pandora was feeding that guy at the dentist's office. We're not talking about GOOD 20th-century classical like minimalist stuff, just bad drivel that sounds like it's out of a sappy movie from the 50s or 60s.
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:34pm Paul D:

Chris T, enjoy your show and listen to archives which is essentially the same as a podcast so will definitely follow over. Maybe do a chat during the show similar to the comments board?
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:35pm Listener 102365:

Gun-toting hippies are the worst.
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:35pm Listener 102365:

Gun-toting hippies are the worst.
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:36pm -andrew-:

Gun toting "medical" marijuana smoking hippies are even worse.
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:39pm -andrew-:

New Jersey: "Take our governor, please!"
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:40pm Rebecca:

The only guy I dated who owned a gun also had sexual dysfunction.
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:42pm V Priceless:

Hey Chris - I'm a New Yawker, and I couldn't agree more with u about the swell Jersey peeps!
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:42pm Fuzzy:

Traffic sucks -- even here. High traffic <> Quality of Life.
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:44pm Fuzzy:

But yer right -- at least there's public transpo and stuff to do within walking distance down your way.
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:44pm Greg from ZONE 5:

Hiya Chris!
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:46pm Paul D:

I think one of my favorite parts of NJ is ASBURY PARK!
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:49pm Paul D:

is chris christie even from NJ? and what the hell is happening with Xanadu at meadowlands.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Tue. 9/1/15 6:53pm Ken From Hyde Park:

I visited Cape May once. I liked it. It was a good place to relax.
Avatar Tue. 9/1/15 6:54pm dale:

was an aerial view show a year or so ago with a guest who went to high school in jersey with christie. in high school he said everyone was trying to get laid and christie was canvassing for the republicans
Avatar Swag For Life Member Tue. 9/1/15 6:58pm chris:

thanks, Chris T! another great show
  Tue. 9/1/15 6:59pm V Priceless:

Fine show, Chris! Thanks!
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