Options Seven Second Delay with Andy and Ken: Playlist from April 23, 2014 Options

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Ken and Andy further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards as the program enters its death throes. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options April 23, 2014: Secret Birthday Party for a Listener

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Artist Approx. start time
Ken & Andy  0:00:00 ()

Listener comments!

Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:01pm mariano:

'Evening, Ken & Andy!
@Whooda, if you're still here, totally agree about the major/minor terminology.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:01pm Matt from Springfield:

This Secret Birthday Party will be a SURPRISE! when it is discovered!

Hey Ken and Andy and Delayers!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:01pm Carmichael:

Did you ever get the end table from Ikea, Andy?
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:03pm Matt from Springfield:

"The Life Coach is OFF Duty. Exist at your own risk."
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:03pm -max-:

Can't believe I'm signed in...
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/23/14 6:04pm Ken From Hyde Park:

If there aren't any birthdays lined up, want me to zip over the the nearest old folks' home and look for a birthday person?
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:05pm Matt from Springfield:

"Why is this evening different than all other evenings? It JUST doesn't matter..."
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:05pm chris:

Torah Duty?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:05pm chris:

@Matt, LOL
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:05pm common:

hey peoples!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:05pm Matt from Springfield:

Now THAT's What I Call A Cancer Stick!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:06pm mariano:

Went to my first seder ever last Monday. Really nice, but a couple of infants kept disrupting the flow (selfish bastards!), so it was very informal, lots of smoke breaks during diaper changes, etc.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:06pm Whooda:

How about a premature birthday surprise for me like your premature obituary for Bob Dylan?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:06pm chris:

The Hillel sandwich is the bomb, Ken!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:06pm Nick the Bard:

Matzoh isn't that bad, I've had cream soda that that was feet flavored.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:07pm Matt from Springfield:

Hey common!

@chris: The Breckman shul of Judaism.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:07pm Matt from Springfield:

@mariano: I'd like to go to one sometime.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:08pm Whooda:

Call up Glenn Campbell in his new facilitated care digs and tell him it's his birthday.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:09pm common:

hey matt!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:09pm northguineahills:

I dig matzoh as a gentile, although it isn't my go-to flat cracker bread.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:09pm common:

only the whoopie...ken just said it.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:10pm Whooda:

@Nick the Bard Shame on you DJ Nick the Bard! I just made my first cream soda with my new auction find of C02 compressed gas. It tasted less like feet and more like bilge water which is infinitely more pleasant tasting than my toes.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:11pm Matt from Springfield:

@Whooda: Your homemade "champagne" makes me want to get CO2 cans myself! All the different wines (and drinks) to make "sparkling"!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:11pm Whooda:

There is a battery operated fart machine toy that was popular with the hoodlums
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:13pm Matt from Springfield:

That's too small a net--Mike Noble is the only Mike listening to this show, and I think that's because he has to!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:14pm Whooda:

I got a big (20#) tank of gas AND a regulator for $15 at auction. I even found the secret formula for Coke on the internet, I had no idea it had bat wings, so I've been burping like a Tupperware dish today in my experiments.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:14pm common:

@whooda: love me some bat wings.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:15pm thunderish' Jay:

i would love to call in shortly in some days .. sorry for the abrupt end and some rudeness in the forum not intended into its foroists
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:16pm Robert:

Ken, tell us the words to Irwin's closing theme!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:17pm Whooda:

@common I've been using your avatar as my desktop image ever since you introduced her, eerrr, i mean *it*. Just can't bring myself to replace her.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:18pm thunderish' Jay:

im in a state of discharge, ill canalize it into music creation.. will have to check the international USA code into the station land line
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:18pm common:

@whooda: great! i stole it from dj tim(i believe). It's too good!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:19pm common:

@whooda again: on my profile settings, the only thing I wrote was "bat wings". It's true.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:20pm Whooda:

@common it's a small, demented world
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:20pm Mitch:

My best bud Colin hates work/life etc. and has tomorrow and friday off. Isn't that a fun little thing to celebrate?
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:20pm sporeleki:

Nickelodeon Gak
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:20pm common:

@whooda: so true. especially here. no, everywhere.
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:20pm Mitch:

he also kissed a girl last weekend
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:21pm Nick the Bard:

www.kidsshowbags.com.au...
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:22pm Matt from Springfield:

"I'm a Soviet-doodle daaaandy..."
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:22pm Whooda:

How 'bout that 'putintang' huh?
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:23pm Robert:

I recorded my own punk lyrics to it over the phone that got published by someone on a compilation cassette I got.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:23pm Whooda:

Driving the *short* bus
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:24pm Robert:

I did a version of O Canada on it too. That was ~30 yrs. ago.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:25pm cklequ interior:

Damn Nicole and her busy friends.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:25pm Whooda:

What the hell with all these eggheads that listen to Ken and Andy? What are the odds????
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:26pm Matt from Springfield:

Andy Breckman you'd better watch your speed.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:26pm Matt from Springfield:

@Whooda: *Punctual* eggheads, no less!!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:28pm Whooda:

@Matt Ok, anal-retentive I can understand. But mathematicians?!?
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:28pm KK:

Hi guyse no one invites me to birthday parties so i'm listening to find out what it's like
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:30pm Whooda:

@KK from my experience it's just like this, mumbling to oneself, whistling Dixie in solitude and desperate attempts at conversation with strangers.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:30pm mariano:

@Matt: Punctual eggheads reminds me of this joke: what do you get when you cross a German and a Russian? Someone who's *precisely* 20 minutes late! Could work with German and lots of other nationalities, I guess, but that's how I heard it.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:32pm Whooda:

haha that jokes reminds me of my Italian x-wife Mariano.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:35pm amanda c:

andy needs to go lose his car in the parking lot to make this episode a bit more humorous.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:35pm Matt from Springfield:

Like those "crossed-nationality" jokes, so long as there's an element of truth to them :)
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:35pm common:

@amanda: hee hee!
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:35pm Robert:

I wonder how many WFMU listeners have a copy of that punk cassette I'm on.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:35pm KK:

@mariano good one @whooda doesn't sound like im missing much. thanks for that.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:38pm common:

what is frozen?
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:39pm KK:

Here's a classic: A German arrives in Paris, upon having his passport verified, the French officer asks "Occupation?"
HE says "Oh, no no, just visiting!"
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:40pm dc pat:

Hilarious, @KK...
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:40pm Peanut:

Hay did the wfmu performance space open yet?
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:40pm mariano:

@Whooda: I'm Hispanic and German (among other things), and somehow I'm always 10-15 minutes early.
@Matt: Agree, gotta tread carefully with those.
@KK: Hah! Definitely writing that one down!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:40pm common:

@KK: hee hee, also
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:41pm rick:

Pharrell Williams' song "Happy" is from The Despicable Me 2 soundtrack. Idina Menzel's "let It Go" is from Frozen.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:41pm Whooda:

@KK that's an old joke the new version involves an American government officials arriving in Nevada.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:43pm Matt from Springfield:

"European Heaven" is where:
the Italians are the lovers,
the French are the cooks,
the British are the policemen,
the Germans are the engineers,
all handled with Swiss precision.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:43pm Matt from Springfield:

...so "European Hell" is where:

the SWISS are the lovers,
the BRITISH are the cooks,
the GERMANS are the policemen,
the FRENCH are the engineers,
all done with ITALIAN precision! ;)
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:44pm Whooda:

hahaha @Matt
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:45pm mariano:

@Matt: Good one!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:45pm mariano:

That is totally a fake "your call cannot be completed!" Come on!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:45pm Matt from Springfield:

The "reaching", is half the fun...

@Whooda/mariano: Thanks, one of my faves!
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:45pm PMD:

That first voice mail didn't sound like a real one.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:47pm amanda c:

fatal flaw #2034920934: finding someone who actually picks up their phone nowadays.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:47pm -max-:

SURPRISE!!! Oh, damn… Too bad, Jeff!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:48pm Carmichael:

"The home phone only rings at home." Brilliant, Andy.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:48pm Whooda:

The NSA average between connection to porn website and ejaculation is seven minutes (seven minute delay)


ne delay)
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:48pm KK:

@Matt the Italian precision got me
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:48pm mariano:

Jesus, every time they say Ariana I jump!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:49pm Matt from Springfield:

"Hey, those narcs are geezers, but they're pretty cool!"
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:51pm cklequ:

Maybe he went to see the Circle Jerks
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:51pm Matt from Springfield:

@KK: Heh! Do you happen to be Italian? I'm not, but I'm Slovenian so I can kinda understand that!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:52pm common:

@cklequ: very good! now that's in my brain!
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:52pm KK:

No, I'm Macedonian in fact but the whole Mediterranean is very not precise so I GET IT on a personal level.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:53pm Matt from Springfield:

"Burn It Down, with Andy B."

@KK: Viva, Makedonija! :)
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:55pm KK:

More like Andy Wreckman
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:55pm cklequ:

Hey... there's still 5 minutes and Nick The Bard has Nicole's number, right?.
Give her a call.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:56pm Whooda:

Unexplainable phenomenon, that is the jingle for the ken and andy show.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:56pm Nick the Bard:

ken and andy have her number now
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/23/14 6:57pm Ken From Hyde Park:

My birthday was a couple Saturdays ago. In 2017, it'll be on a Wednesday, and a chance for 7SD birthday mayhem. Unless Doomsday happens before then.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/23/14 6:57pm Ange:

It's an OK topic I hope.. Grandma Phyllis is REALLY EXCITED. I have heard these stories 100 million times though.. so let me know if I sound interested enough.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:57pm Whooda:

Train shortage
  Wed. 4/23/14 6:58pm Listener Julian:

I love this show so much.
Avatar Wed. 4/23/14 6:58pm Matt from Springfield:

"Dead Air Gulch, because no one gets out of WFMU's Air alive!"...

Well that was a terrific level of anti-climatictivity! :)
Thanks Ken & Andy! Have a good evening everyone!
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